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Book Reviews ...
"I read in excess of 50 books a year but I had a unique experience as I finished this one ... I wept. Vancouver-born and based author Ariole K. Alei shares the story of her personal unfolding. With courage and tenacity she exposes her soul and herself to the world. She shares her joys, her pain, her triumphs and her 'failures'. From a secluded cabin in the Shuswap to the snow capped mountains of Dharmsala and audiences with the Dalai Lama, this writer weaves a truly remarkable story. But there is more here than a personal journey ... there is a message and an understanding for us all. Most of you reading these lines are aware of the pivotal time in which we live. Ariole's books speaks to that time. If you believe in spirit - lead life. If you believe in a universal plan, if you believe in honesty, humility and courage, then this book is for you! 10 out of 10"
Reviewed in "Issues" magazine.
Ariole K. Alei
ISBN 978-1-4116-9043-1
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“This book is so easy to read because it is in the form of a conversation between the two authors, and you flow along with them, becoming the third point of the triangle, witnessing the wisdom and skill in their dialogue. They are a married couple, sharing from their past and present, and in learning about them, you may well find you learn about yourself also.
“Many people enter a primary relationship with the attitude that if they have to ask for help, then there is something intrinsically wrong with that relationship. Most women giving birth to their first child don’t expect to instantly be equipped with all the right attributes of parenthood – they read the books, attend classes, ask questions, and never assume that they are lacking as parents by seeking out the information and guidance. So when we meet that man or woman who may partner us for the foreseeable future, why do we feel that we should know everything about being in relationship with another?
“As they lob the conversation back and forth, they speak profoundly yet simply about intuition, compassion, forgiveness, gratitude, spiritual consciousness, and, of course, being in a loving and fulfilling relationship. This is not a text-book, it is a living guide for you to use to grow, heal, nurture and thoroughly enjoy your loving relationship. I was drawn to this book because relationship issues are at the heart of my practice, and I am pleased to say that it will be on the short list of highly recommended books for clients and friends alike. A final delightful point: as well as giving you some questions and exercises to get you thinking and moving forward, the authors invite you to write the last chapter! Wonderful.”
Reviewed in "Issues" magazine.
Colin Hillstrom and Ariole K. Alei
ISBN 978-1-4116-9155-1
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"Written by Vancouver based author this is a collection of earth wisdoms, which speak to the heart. A woman can only receive from a man that which he is capable of giving writes Hillstrom and as such our relationship mirror who and what we are.
"The book is divided into two sections: first, why we must love more, and second, what to do about it. Simply put, we must love more because it is the only way we can truly honor our partners. This attitude also activates the ancient truth that 'like attracts like.' I must bring to relationship those things I would take out. The book intertwines poetry, musing, and teachings into format, which both speaks to and motivates the heart. I found it a delightful and penetrating read."
Reviewed in "Issues" magazine.
Colin Hillstrom
ISBN 1-4116-7109-0
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CLIMBING THE MOUNTAIN OF LIFE
Conversations about Love, Joy, Peace and Enlightenment
with international Life & Relationship Coaches Colin Hillstrom and Ariole K. Alei
Colin ... A powerful relationship metaphor is the idea of two people climbing a mountain together.
Ariole ... Meaning ... ?
Colin ... Just imagine that everyone has a mountain to climb. We call this the 'Mountain of Life'. Everyone begins at the valley and looks towards the summit, which is the peak they want to ascend to. It is at this peak of the mountain where we experience the greatest, most desirable human emotions which include oneness, peace, love and joy. Would you rather climb this mountain yourself? Or with a climbing partner?
By now most people see the picture: Climbing the mountain with a life partner with whom they maintain a mutually respectful, inspiring, motivating and encouraging relationship - versus a disharmonious, conflict ridden or even hostile relationship which makes ascending the mountain nearly an impossibility. Why not be allies instead?
Ariole … This is, perhaps, the centerpiece in a good relationship. Understanding - as a core awareness - that our partner is our greatest ally in our personal growth, learning and development, is the most important discovery at the outset of a healthy relationship. This awareness can take place at the front end of a relationship, or it can be gained - like a 'dawning', a new light of consciousness - midway through the relationship. Either way, it will transform the very being of the two people involved. Not to mention the powerful 'ripple effect' that this new awareness creates around them, through their new feelings, thoughts, speech, and behaviour. They begin to radiate and emanate joy, trustworthiness and leadership, showing others how and what a relationship can be.
Colin … Ariole, what do you think most people want in a relationship?
Ariole … I feel - even more than I think it - that people want to be respected. They want to be accepted as they are, and through this respect, they hope to grow and to unfold the radiant beauty which is inside of them. This beauty is already inside of everyone. Just like a seedling - a plant - it needs to be loved and respected in order to grow. People grow by seeing in themselves - or someone else seeing in them - their capability, their full potential in any given instant or situation or opportunity. This 'seeing' holds the space for them to grow into their full potential - their radiant beauty. Sometimes holding the space by seeing someone else's potential requires - it 'calls' us - to challenge them. To catalyze them into new action, new thoughts, and new feelings about themselves. Our greatest ally is sometimes the one who challenges us the most. The difference between a healthy and an unhealthy relationship is that in a healthy relationshp, the trust - and the consciousness - exists for partners to challenge each other in a context of great love.
Colin … That's how we climb the mountain together, isn't it? By supporting each other through our ups and downs. When things are difficult, instead of pushing our partner over the edge, we can look up, smile and say something like … “I know it’s a challenge. It’s not easy. But let’s get on with it. We’re meant to succeed.”
Ariole ... It's really important to understand the distinction between helping, supporting, and challenging your partner (or your friend, or anyone for that matter) in a halthy, ally way versus doing this in a codependent way.
In codependency, we are agreeing - often without even being aware of this or discussing it outright - to keep each other as we are. To keep each other small. To keep each other 'safe' - meaning in this case to keep each other in familiar territory even if it isn't healthy for us.
In a healthy relationship, we are each strong enough to challenge and be challenged. In fact, with every occurrence of challenge between partners, the relationship becomes stronger. And it is clear to both partners and to honest people observing them that they are growing, that 'something is different about them', that they are becoming more courageous, more truthful, more direct, more in love.
Colin ... In love with life.
People who suffer from bad relationships lack in some way their love for life. They have somehow withdrawn from hobbies and interactions with people. Their values, their inspirations, and their lives have become dull. The more we love life, the more we respect life. And love and life to me are the same. So the more we respect life, the more we respect love and thus treat our life partner with reverence and dignity. This can be learned.
It can be learned by being honest. By making a consiocus effort to be truthful. Because the moment that we're honest with our partner, we treat them with respect
And ourselves. We treat ourselves with respect. ... It's reciprocal. That's the nature of healing. What we extend to someone else is what we receive. There is no separation between we and they. What we give, we simultaneously receive.
That's the union. That's when we begin to truly create one energy field - a shared energy field - the 'union' which so many people aspire to. This is 'the peak' - the place where our two mountains join.
* This conversation between Colin Hillstrom and Ariole K. Alei is an excerpt from their forthcoming book "HeartSong: Conversations About Love, Joy and Sex - Discover the Secret to a Fulfilling Love Relationship". For information regarding release date and where to buy this book, e-mail info@veraxis.net .
* This artice was first published in Synchronicity - The Magazine, June/July 2006.
© Colin Hillstrom and Ariole K. Alei 2006
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WHEN A MAN REALLY LOVES A WOMAN
by Colin Hillstrom
When a man really loves a woman ...
she relaxes and releases all of her tension.
When a man really loves a woman
she re-unites with God.
When a man really loves a woman ...
she re-gains her trust in love & life and re-members her own truth.
When a man really loves a woman ...
her fears transform into love.
When a man really loves a woman ...
she embodies the DIVINE FEMALE.
When a man really loves a woman ...
the GODDESS and her GOD reappear.
* First published in The Healing Journal, January/February 2006
© Colin Hillstrom 2006
THE SECRET TO A SPIRITUAL RELATIONSHIP
by Colin Hillstrom
When a man really loves a woman, he gives his love to her patiently
He is in no hurry. He has no goal. He seeks no excitement. He has no expectations. He just loves her unconditionally
From and through his heart.
Woman is neither Man's slave nor his servant. Her role is
not to excite or to please him. Far from it!
A man's true role is to delight Woman.
He gives love, she receives love.
And amplifies it!
His pure unconditional love ignites and awakens the magnificent love energy,
which is dormant within her,
and together
they once again complete the great circle of Love, leading to eternal and infinite ...
So "don't hurry love". Be patient with each other. Be honest and true
Still your minds and activate your hearts.
Putting love first and intending to always love one another
and life
even more
is the secret to a spiritual relationship
in which you both grow, flourish, prosper and glow.
Isn't this what you are hoping for? Isn't this your life-dream?
* First published in The Healing Journal, January/February 2006
© Colin Hillstrom 2006
These 'poems' are excerpts from Colin Hillstrom's recently released book "When A Man Really Loves A Woman".
For a FREE complete chapter please e-mail.
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