Ego’s Hold

Insights can be buried deep.  Like seeds inches beneath the soil, they can remain indefinitely dormant, latent, unsprouted.  To dig to them – to penetrate the darkness that keeps them hidden – can require determination – might – sheer laser light of consciousness.  We need to sense them.  We need to want them – to be able to uncover the soil that cloaks them and let them see light.

            Such is the case last evening and this morning.  My husband and I watched “The Brothers Bloom” – one of the amazing movies that touch something deep and marvelous.

            In it the younger Bloom yearns for something he has not yet known – “an unscripted life”.  We watch the dawning of his realization that everyone who has been attracted to him has been attracted to the character he was playing in that ‘scene’.  No one knows who he really is.

            Like any great art, this movie is working on me.  It is clawing away at the soil that has for so long masqueraded as the seed.

            Here is what is being revealed to me, as I burrow tenaciously through my own mind to see this Light …

            Ego continuously crafts its perception of who we are – who I am.  As it does so, it is scripting my reality.  For in ‘commission one’ Ego[1], Ego is in charge of my voyage – my destiny, my life.  It is literally commissioned with this.

            And so I – my reality, my experiences, my emotions, my ideas, my thoughts, my behaviors, my patterns, my idea of ‘I’ – completely follow, to a ‘t’, the identity that Ego crafts for me.  I am its ‘puppet’.  I walk, talk, think, feel, and do as it scripts for me.  For its script is a match to the character – the identity it creates of me.

            Thus as humans in ‘commission one’, we are like monkeys in a cage.  As long as Ego ‘commission one’ has its hold, we are its slaves.[2]  Literally, we cannot break out of Ego’s identity of us.

            As I grasp this, this morning, I comprehend more clearly the ages old saying, “Know thyself” and the ancient question, “Who am I?”  I have heard these both, and reflected on these both, countless times.  Yet from the state of mind.  Today I begin to feel these – from the bounty of heart.

            ‘Who am I?’ is often referred to as a seed question.  It is, literally, this.  It is consciousness penetrating the soil of Ego’s identity hold … to re-cognize who I am beyond my Ego’s perception of me.

            Why does Ego do this?  Partly because it is commissioned to orient Soul in Space and Time.[3]  Partly because Time has elapsed for so long (Ego ‘commission two’ is only now about to be ‘born’) that this has become an ingrained, fossilized way of being.

            That this question is dawning in so many more minds – in variations such as, “Who am I … really?”, “There must be more to life than this …”, “Is this physical reality all there is?”, “If fame or wealth doesn’t buy happiness, what does?”, “What is my real purpose here?”, “Will humanity make the grade – and turn a corner to ensure its ultimate survival?”, “What is ‘2012’?”, “I’ve lost my (job, spouse, children have grown and moved away, breast, other anatomy due to illness, …) …  What is the meaning of life?” – and so many others, is a sign that Ego is loosening its hold as it prepares to shift – like a great iceberg, a massive oil drilling platform, a huge tanker.

            Ego is preparing to let go its hold as sculptor of our identity. 

            Soul – our limitless, eternally benevolent Self – is about to rise in us again.  Like a seed that has patiently awaited all of Time, it is about to sprout.  And as it does, prophecies of greatness beyond all Ego imagination will be proclaimed.  For we will no longer be limited to what Ego ‘thinks’, what Ego ‘knows’, and what Ego is ‘familiar’ with.  Ego will, again, swim in the sea of Soul.

            And as it does, it will once again re-member ecstasy – the freedom to truly “Know thyself”. 

Questions to Ponder:  Who do you think you are?  What glimpses have you had that you are more than this, or altogether different than this?  Have you actively explored any of these glimpses – or at least allowed your self to ponder and reflect on them?

Who might you be – how might you be – if you weren’t fulfilling the identity that Ego is scripting for you now?

These are colossal questions and it is imperative that you respect their inherent power.  They are not ‘toys’.  They have the potential, shamanically, to set in motion major shifts in you.  So explore them gently.  Ponder them slowly.  Breathe deeply as you do.  Ego – and your sense of identity – are delicate.  Be respectful of them. 

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[1] See the forthcoming The Ego and The Soul – A Map for Humanity’s Ultimate Survival for further extrapolation on ‘commission one’ Ego.

[2] Read the forthcoming The Ego and The Soul – A Map for Humanity’s Ultimate Survival to understand that this is not ‘ego bashing’.  This is description of deep reality – to be compassionately, co-creatively shifted into ‘commission two’ – wherein Ego makes its ‘Polar Shift’ into being Soul’s ‘Co-Pilot’.  As this happens, Soul is no longer Ego’s ‘slave’.  Ego is now co-creator with its numinously vantaged intelligence as ally to Soul.

[3] See more in the forthcoming The Ego and The Soul – A Map for Humanity’s Ultimate Survival.

* Images with gratitude to jcarrot.org, wildlife-pictures-online.com, charlestonteaparty.org